“Ignorance of the law is no excuse, young man.”
“And yours is a particularly heinous crime - matricide!”
"You can’t blame me for what happened, judge! I was an infant for Chrissake! I had no control over.."
"Spare me. The 29th Amendment states clearly that you were a person at the moment of conception. Persons have rights but also responsibilities my friend. Your actions within the womb lead to the death of your mother. Though it wasn’t planned, you clearly are responsible. There is no statue of limitations on killing. In vivo matricide was recognized by the court in 2022. Now that you are 18, you can be tried as an adult."
"I was a newborn! I wasn’t even aware then!"
"That’s why it’s only manslaughter. Next case."
“And yours is a particularly heinous crime - matricide!”
"You can’t blame me for what happened, judge! I was an infant for Chrissake! I had no control over.."
"Spare me. The 29th Amendment states clearly that you were a person at the moment of conception. Persons have rights but also responsibilities my friend. Your actions within the womb lead to the death of your mother. Though it wasn’t planned, you clearly are responsible. There is no statue of limitations on killing. In vivo matricide was recognized by the court in 2022. Now that you are 18, you can be tried as an adult."
"I was a newborn! I wasn’t even aware then!"
"That’s why it’s only manslaughter. Next case."
4 comments:
"A man's got to know his limitations."- Dirty Harry.
So, a year in minimum security, possibly on work release. Six years probation. No problem there. Not likely to repeat the crime. What kind of community service?
Interesting idea. This would make an interesting editorial in Mississippi. They are trying to get a law on the ballot concerning birth control.
Mike - leave it to a retired justice worker to start to work out the logistic details of this satire ;)
Jerry, that law actually was the trigger for this diversion
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